A hypochondriac is someone who is obsessed about his/her health. For at least six months this person has been convinced that he/she is seriously ill, despite the fact that doctors reassure them that there is nothing wrong with them. Obviously, this obsession affects their daily lives, and their relationships, and frequently leads to all sorts of unnecessary and expensive medical treatments.
Both men and women can have Hypochondria and this “condition” afflicts all age groups and economic classes.
Hypochondriacs usually misinterpret normal physical symptoms. Take a headache, for example. A normal person with a headache would just take a tablet and forget about it. But a hypochondriac will be convinced that it is the first sign of a brain tumour.
(Image courtesy bipolando.blogspot.com)
So are you a hypochondriac? Here’s a quiz to help you find out:
1. When you phone your doctor:
a) He/she sighs and asks, “So what is it today?”
b) He/she refuses to take your call
c) He/she cannot remember who you are
d) He/she sounds worried and asks why you’re only calling now
2. The last time you were ill was:
a) Ill? who me?
b) A year or two ago
c) You get flu at least once a year
d) You’re not feeling too great while filling in this quiz
3. If you have been really ill, and someone tells you you’re looking better, how does that make you feel?
a) Delighted, because you’re really feeling better
b) Miffed, because you think they don’t know how ill you really are
c) You’re pleased, even though you’re still feeling under the weather
d) Pleased – you hate lying in bed and not being able to do things for yourself
4. How do you think others react to your ailments?
a) If they knew how ill you really were, they would not look so bored
b) Even if you are ill, you don’t really talk about it much
c) There are surely more interesting things to talk about than illnesses?
d) What ailments?
5. Do you think the doctor is lying to you when he tells you that you’re fine?
a) No, and the relief is immense
b) He/she is a doctor after all and should know what’s going on?
c) You would feel better after consulting a specialist
d) The stupid quack – just imagine how he is going to feel when he finds out that you do indeed have leukaemia
a) You wouldn’t call it a chest – rather an enormous trunk
b) A rural state hospital could manage on these contents for quite a while
c) You have a small box containing the most essential things
d) What medicine chest?
7. Where do you find your medical information?
a) You phone the doctor
b) You have your own small medical library
c) You don’t find information – ignore it for long enough, it will go away
d) You get everything you can lay your hands on: books, mags, the internet, pamphlets.
8. What is the first thing you do when you wake up in the morning?
a) You get into your walking clothes to go for your daily walk
b) You get up and get going
c) You take your daily medication
d) You lie in bed and wonder which part of your body will give you problems today
9. For three days you’ve had a pain in your lower back. What do you do about it?
a) You think, “I deserve it. Next time I’ll think twice about carrying six boxes of books to the car all on my own
b) You decide to go to the doctor if things have not improved by Wednesday
c) You prepare yourself for a life with kidney failure
d) You do nothing and accept that this too shall pass
10. Your favorite TV program is:
a) You are too busy to watch TV
b) The news
d) Any hospital series
11. How do you feel about your medical scheme?
a) You are urgently trying to find a medical scheme that will let you claim more for visits to the doctor and for medication
b) You have to belong to one, but you really think it is a waste of money, as you hardly ever use it
c) By September most of your benefits have been exhausted
d) You’re constantly trying to think of ways to derive more benefits from your medical scheme
12. When you get a headache, you think that
a) it will probably go away quickly
b) you must take a headache tablet immediately
c) you definitely have brain cancer
d) you should stay in bed for the day
Send in your answers!